


can't decide if it's a choice (getting swept away)

by NeverMessWithTeddyBears



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/M, but now i don't get bragging rights, the way i had this idea before the finale canonized it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-16
Updated: 2020-08-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:41:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25936084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeverMessWithTeddyBears/pseuds/NeverMessWithTeddyBears
Summary: Daniel writes her letters.Daisy keeps each one.
Relationships: Skye | Daisy Johnson & Daniel Sousa, Skye | Daisy Johnson/Daniel Sousa
Comments: 66
Kudos: 241





	can't decide if it's a choice (getting swept away)

The scraps of paper he finds lying around on the Zephyr aren't much - usually just a cut off corner that fits into his palm, one he can stuff into the pocket of his pants without even folding it once - but he makes do.

He writes down little things. New words he doesn't know and what they mean. What time they're in and the top three things he needs to know (sometimes, if he has a bigger scrap of paper, he'll ask for five). Explanations about one device and instructions for another.

Before long, though, he's writing down things he knows about Daisy. Writes down how she takes her coffee and what her daily routine consists of and every pop culture reference she says that he doesn't recognize so he can try and catch up in the few moments of quiet he ends up having - and there's a lot to catch up to and not that many quiet moments, so he's often falling behind. She explains them, anyways, and he writes that down, too.

Daniel guards those papers with more care than usual, especially when he's got their contents memorized quicker than any instruction which might be more pertinent in their current situation.

He tries not to think on it too much.

* * *

They're in the 80's and he has ten minutes and a wallet with some actual money so he uses it to buy himself a journal - being careful to ask for one that needs the dates to be written in by hand instead of being that of the current year - and makes sure to get the one with the most pages. He gets a pen even though the one he's kept in his pocket for years now - actually decades if he counts the time travel - is still working, but Daniel thinks it's better to be safe than sorry.

When Daisy sees his writing in it that night - although, what _is_ time anymore, anyways? - she pauses, giving him a look.

"I could've set you up with a digital one." she says, shrugging, eating dinner on her feet from a bowl, leaning on the wall opposite him.

Daniel shakes his head. "Thanks, but I think I prefer a physical copy." he replies. "There's something about writing it down by hand..."

"Yeah, I get that." Daisy says in-between bites. Once she finishes her dinner she moves, making another stop next to him as she reads over his shoulder. Well, she more like glances, not really reading what he's written - opposed to what someone might thing, she _can_ value a person's privacy, even if she _is_ a hacker at heart. "Nice handwriting." she teases, but it's honest. Daniel smiles up at her, shakes his head.

"I appreciate the compliment."

"No, honestly." Daisy says, walking out. "I can barely read my own."

The sound of his laugh follows her.

* * *

Whenever he writes about her, Daniel realizes, it's always with more detail than the rest of the entry.

Again, he tries not to think on it too much.

* * *

Each time loop, he takes a moment and writes as much as he can in his journal as a bunch of shorthand bullet points, his otherwise neat handwriting messed by the rush.

The first dozen loops that happened, Daisy would tell him how it's useless. Would tell him that it'll all get erased anyways; that it wouldn't work. Nothing worked - it was just her and Coulson (when she wouldn't die and forget and take five loops to power him up again) and Deke calling out the shortening distance - and she was slowly losing her mind, fearing hope would be next to go

"Who knows." he'd say each time. "Maybe this time it'll stick. Maybe this time it'll help you." Daniel smiles up at her. "It's worth a shot."

And Daisy would check the pages, would find them blank each time, but still she finds reassurance in his belief in her. Finds strength in his perseverance, in the continuous tries. Finds a rock in the man that's always there sleeping by her pod, ready to do whatever she needed of him without a second thought, without a single memory of a time loop, before she needed to give a single piece of proof like with the others.

So Daisy takes a loop - finds that she needs more of that if this is going to continue - and tells him everything, and even when it's all gone in the next loop he's there; ready and willing.

She finds that, _fuck_ , that might just be love and that, _fuck_ , she might just let herself want it.

She kisses him, Daniel pulling her back to him for one more when they break apart and it feels nice. Feels more than nice.

Later, from the corner of her eye, she can see him write something on a scrap piece of paper, can see him stuff it in his pocket, can see him almost protect it.

She never does find out what he wrote down, because everything resets, and there's no scrap of paper, no Sousa writing down a message, no words being put in his pocket.

But this time, though, this time she fixes it. So there's that.

* * *

(In an attempt he knows is futile, Daniel Sousa takes the first scrap of paper he can find, writes down _KISS DAISY WHENEVER YOU GET THE CHANCE_ and puts it in his pocket. Guards it until the timeline resets.

Doesn't have it in his pocket anymore. Not that he'd ever remember to look. Not that he'd remember anything.)

* * *

He kisses her, Daisy pulling him back to her when they break apart and it feels nice. More than nice.

He thinks, _I want to do this whenever I get the chance_.

She thinks, _I really fucking hope we get to_.

* * *

By the time they're back on earth - _their time another timeline who the hell knows he's stopped keeping track he'll just follow Daisy anyway_ \- he finds that his journal is on its last pages, and he has to carefully open it so the scrap bits of paper that are thrown in throughout it don't fall all over the floor and into oblivion.

Daisy gets him a new one, custom made and leather bound with his name _DANIEL SOUSA_ at the front and six hundred pages ready to get filled. Gets him a personalized stationary writing set and the best pens she can find online.

"Six hundred pages, huh?" he asks her, smiling after he kisses her in gratitude.

She shrugs. "I'm sure you'll fill it in no time."

Yeah, he's pretty sure of that, too.

* * *

She finds letters in her bag and on her side of their bed on Zephyr Three and on her bedside table in the one apartment they have in New York and on the coffee table and on the pilot's seat and wherever she turns. Finds notes written on scrap paper in the pockets of her jeans and her coats and her jackets and her suit. Sousa discovers post-its and suddenly they're everywhere. Words upon words upon words that make her smile and tear up and her heart clench in a way it hasn't since Lincoln - in a way it never has.

Daniel writes to her about how beautiful she looks. Writes about how strong she is. How smart. Writes about how he loves that blue dress she wore when they finally got to have dinner at the apartment and writes how she's not such a bad cook even though all she did was make the salad. Writes about all the things he loves about her and, in the more intimate ones - ones she never knew a proper gentleman like one Daniel Sousa would ever dare write - about what he did to her and what she did to him and what he wants to do to her and what he knows she wants to do to him and, _hell_ , if she doesn't read those three times over without break.

She has every single one etched into her memory.

* * *

When he fills up his six-hundred page journal, he asks if she wants to read it.

She's read bits and pieces here and there, helped with a word or two, with a memory or five; but mostly she was content to just watch him write, and there was never even an inkling to ask him to let her read further, just like there wasn't all those months ago back at Zephyr One when he bought his own.

Still, Daisy says yes, and every few pages she finds herself. The first few time, Daisy mentions it teasingly, rejoices in seeing Daniel blush. However, the more she reads the less she can speak on it. It's like something sacred, the way he writes about her.

He writes, _I never knew you could love a person this much yet here I am, loving her more today than I did yesterday, will probably love her more tomorrow._

He writes, _Whenever I feel lost I look to here and there it is. Home._

He writes, _Daisy Daisy Daisy Daisy Daisy._

And she reaches the last page, looks up at him, tears in her eyes and love in her heart. Takes the pen that's on her bedside table, finds the last bit of white there is left.

She writes, _Marry me?_

* * *

Whenever Daisy calls, her family answers, so Daniel's not surprised that they're all there, sitting in the few rows of chairs at a small, intimate, beautiful venue, smiling so widely and lovingly his own heart aches.

May sits in the very front row, the tears in her eyes something she'll attribute as a side-affect of feeling everyone else's emotions instead of her own ever getting the best of her as Mack walks Daisy down the aisle - and there's Kora and Fitz and Alya and Bobbi and Hunter and the rest of this makeshift family they've made that's small and was broken but is _here_ and strong and loving and _theirs_ \- to where Coulson stands, waiting to officiate.

"I'm proud of you, Tremors." Mack says when he leans in to hug Daisy, planting a kiss in her hair. He then smiles at Jemma before moving to the opposite side to stand next to Sousa.

When they get to the vows, Jemma hands her an envelope and Daisy pulls out a letter of her own and Daniel laughs, tears falling, pulling out his own from the pocket inside his suit.

Mack hands them the rings and soon they're pronounced husband and wife and when Daniel kisses her, it's like that first kiss all those years ago.

Nothing's ever felt more right.

* * *

Daniel writes her letters.

Daisy keeps each one.


End file.
